I want to paint a picture for you of what life looks and feels like as a single parent. First, it’s wonderful. The smiles of your child mean more, their “I Love Yous,” speak louder and watching their good decisions reflects on the upbringing and choices you created and enabled them to choose. Secondly: It sucks.
It’s not negative for the reasons that you’d imagine, far from it. I have no drop-offs or pick-ups to organize or worry about. No child support to argue over, and no holidays to spend alone without the little girl I love most. It’s the judgement, the intolerance and the ignorance that remind me of the type of society we live in. I’m treated differently because my life, is different. Perhaps that’s why, I march for gay rights, and other rights in effort to stamp out the voices of those who refuse to accept life choices other than their own. It’s also, a culmination of bitterness that resonates from this article: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/02/21/single-mothers-bad-for-so_n_825446.html?ref=tw
I became a single parent by CHOICE. I could have had an abortion, and the world wouldn’t have HER.
Look at her face, REALLY, truly, look at her face. I see brains, wit, power, passion and incredible beauty in her sweet face. To tell me in a recent article that 7 out of 10 American people believe she will bring LESS to society because she is from me, is not only a dis-service to our society as a whole, it’s a complete rejection of the power this little being holds inside. Single parents work harder, faster, longer, and more creatively than most two-person families, by CHOICE. Because we do not have time to be complacent, (as @EdKling) reminded me. We only have time to model achievements and success so our children will learn not from our MISTAKES, but from our PASSION to become MORE than we ever thought we could.
I could have never birthed Ava and THIS FACE would never have graced the earth. Do you know another baby who held her head up moments after her birth to look around? I remember that moment distinctively. I gasped, and the hospital nurse gasped and she looked straight behind me and silently stated, “I am HERE.” She looks to YOU, to stop judging her, demeaning her and stuffing her into a box of, “Less Than,” because she was born, only of ME.
I don’t write this for myself. I can handle critics and those who believe that only two-parent families ‘give back’ adequately to our world. I write this for HER. I have more passion and more hope in me and my future than an unlimited number of two-parent families. Why? Because the moment Ava was born, I knew we were destined for greatness.
For the 7/10 of you who truly believe that there is only ONE way to raise a happy, intelligent, amazing child? Here’s a free ticket to what this little girl and her incredibly-driven mommy can really do.
Babies and Mommies, FOREVER.
Want to learn more about Ava and I’s journey? Read a few exerpts below: