The talk of CES this year is tablets and migrating platform technology that is allowing consumers, professionals and trendsetters to be more connected than ever before.   Talk is just talk, until you look at the numbers.  After disappointing growth numbers in the past 2 years, Greg Shapiro, President and CEO of CEA is forecasting consumer electronic growth by 3.5% or, $186 billion dollars.   During a recent conference Shapiro announced, “You may conclude as I already have that at this CES, we have more innovation and cause for celebration than any event in our history.”  Unfortunately, from what I’ve seen, this just isn’t the case.

I’m going to dub this year’s CES, the “That Apple Convention,” which is unfortunate and completely characteristic of companies jumping on the monopoly of one concept.   Breaking down the IPad, or even the concepts of it’s basic form we see a sleek device that responds to touch and grows by applications, or user-guided downloads.  It’s always been a very large Ipod for me.  And I’ve always wondered, “what’s next?”  The IPhone, had it’s share of press as well, as an estimated* 99.9% of giveaways were related to apple products or IPhone Accessories.  It leaves one thinking, “where is the Android love?”

*Estimated with the amount of times I left something at the table or happily flashed my G2 phone.

I was convinced on Friday afternoon that CES was a gathering rogue Apple shareholders, peddling “innovative” products aimed to re-wet the palate of those who may have forgotten about Apple’s successes over the past 5 years.  In either case, the smaller and often unsung heroes of CES were not the ones being covered by national media or fountainheads of geekery.

With a solid two more days to go,  I need something dramatic.  More so than washing machines that ‘ping me‘ when my load is ready to go into the dryers, or a million different types of phone skins, covers and gizmos.  CNN covered it perfectly when their article stated, “It seems no gadget is too small or insignificant for an internet hookup.” Hopefully next year we can see Luv’s diapers with microchips inserted to let parents know when their child’s pants are wet so they can immediately change them.  Either we’ve gotten really, really, awesome or just incredibly, undeniably, lazy.

Yes, there are tablet computers.  In fact, BetaNews covered the “Seven Tablets You Should Know About.”  With everyone trying to mimic Apple’s success, the word, “Innovation,” hardly seems to even be worthy of it’s usage.  See how easy that was to cover tablets?  Now, I can move onto more pressing things, like the strippers.

Exhibitors, if you need a half-naked model to get people into your booth, you are doing technology WRONG.  Really, truly.   I apologize for my snarky tone: but I am entirely, throughly sick of retailers and marketing companies who actually thought it was a good idea to have someone bouncing on a stage while she displays IPhone covers above her hip.  One company in particular stood out for their blatant and frighteningly-disgusting sexism.

On*Star: “Oh Hers?” Campaign.  At bus stops around Las Vegas Blvd. signs reflect the On*Star logo and a short message to visit their booth on CES.  Really, On*Star, was something less degrading already taken? I’d like to talk to the 5th graders who thought this was actually worth blowing up, (no pun intended,) and plastering at every bus stop.  I realize that by posting this, I let those sexist, terrorists win, but… boobs are overshadowing GOOD, FUNCTIONAL, TECHNOLOGY.  Will no one think of the implications? …..  I’m hoping that the next 2 days leave my mouth firmly planted on the ground and my dreams delightfully inspired with those who are thinking out of the box of current trends.