The Power Of No…

I’m a firm believer in saying yes, but what happens when the word yes starts taking over your work and personal life leaving you wondering if you made the wrong choice?

dez

I’m a nice person. I know this. I’ve been told this by many people. My actions that lead people to this conclusion are not by accident; meaning that I was raised to be the way I am. However, one of the biggest consequences of my niceness is my constant need to help people. To fulfill some need that they have with that help and worry about myself later. This consequence leads me to Yes rather often. The number of times I say Yes is directly proportional to my stress level and feelings of relaxation. The more I say Yes the higher my stress and the lower my relaxation.

Did I just describe you? Don’t get me wrong, to build your personal brand in your personal and professional life you have to say Yes more times than you’d like to, but it’s a necessary evil. The problem is that the more you say Yes the more the same answer is expected of you. Soon your personal time is gone and you’re left wondering why you’re constantly on the run doing things for other people (even if you’re getting paid).
I started saying No about 6 months ago. I was stressed, had taken on too many projects and my actual interests were starting to suffer because of it. It wasn’t a gradual thought process for me to get to saying No the first time. It was one thing. Nothing out of the ordinary, but when asked if I could do it my first reaction was (for the first time) to decline the opportunity. I did so respectively and honestly explaining that I just had too much on my plate and couldn’t get the project done.

I expected to feel dread over not taking on that additional job regarding my relationship with the client I was working with. The client took the news surprisingly well. After a month of me cleaning up the tasks that were impeding on my personal life; I called the client back and told them that I appreciated their business and that if they had any future projects that I would be happy to take a look for them. I have since done work for them on a more limited basis.

I feel that my quality of work provided to clients has improved immensely, not because I’m doing better work than before but because when I’m doing the work it is within my time-frame and in the period of time that I set aside for doing client work. I work a full-time job so this time is already limited, but I’m glad to not be spending the greater portion of my evenings and weekends doing client work.

I began to realize that I could make a lot of money by saying Yes to everything, but that the importance of money became less important as my personal time became more limited. What was I working so hard for but to make my personal and social life more comfortable? How was taking all that time to do client work actually benefiting me? Money replaced comfort and personal time which increased stress and decreased sleep. Ironically enough this meant more money decreased happiness.

The last four paragraphs have started with “I”. Saying No is the more selfish choice to make in these situations, but you get more I time because you are more focused on the task at hand instead of the 20 other tasks you have to complete. Two unexpected takeaways became of my decision. I was able to more clearly focus on my full-time job because I wasn’t working my lunch hours to complete tasks so that I could go see a movie with my fiancé and not have to turn on my laptop that night.
The second takeaway was the fact that I have actually made more money per client job in the last six months and have actually made more money overall because of it. In short, No has become profitable. I raised my rates slightly (about 10% on average), but my time appears more valuable to my clients and they are more willing to give me larger projects to be done instead of multiple small projects.  I put more value in who I was and what I offered and my clients noticed.

The best advice I can give you:

  • Manage your time wisely, make plans and stick to them.
  • Give yourself realistic deadlines that don’t involve late nights.
  • Communicate more with your clients and the results will be a better you and a better brand.

Justin Dessonville (Dez) is an incredible resource for Mobile and PC hardware, software and mobile application testing, and WordPress solutions.  He is also the sole creator of Vent Anon, and writes on IamDez, which focuses on personal stories, social media, and some software testing. Each Tuesday he has a conversation with a Minneapolis/St. Paul blogger in his Tuesday Blogversation series.   You can find him on Twitter: @iamdez.

Post to Twitter Post to Digg Post to Facebook Post to LinkedIn Post to Technorati

4 Responses to The Power Of No…

  • Guest Post: Power Of Saying No | iamdez

    [...] Here’s the post: The Power Of Saying No [...]

    Reply
  • scott mckenzie

    Very well said Justin. Stretched too thin and your work is affected. Proverbs 15: 16 @ 17……Better a little with the fear of the Lord than great wealth with turmoil. Better a meal of vegetables where there is love than a fattened calf with hatred.

    Reply
  • scott mckenzie

    Very well said. Stretched too thin and your work suffers. Money does not make you happy or successful…Poof…here today…gone tomorrow. Proverbs 15:17…Better a meal of vegetables where this love than a fattened calf with hatred.

    Reply
  • Dawn Bryant (@simplydawnb)

    A great reminder that saying yes to one thing always mean saying no to something else…and that “no” thing is usually more important…and we don’t even realize we’re saying “no.”

    I, personally, need to always keep this front and center. Thanks!

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Post Comment