The truth? We all struggle.

We can tell our values by looking at our checkbook stubs.  ~Gloria Steinem

I work with incredible people.  My day job consists of helping other humans with game plans, or passionate proposals to success.  There are three of us, who took over $150k in job cuts to work in the office that we do.  Sometimes, we swap stories of how we’re getting by.  One coworker rented out his house and sleeps in the basement, another sold her home all together and cut all her spending.  We volunteer time, and take on clients- but mostly, at the end of the day, we all get by on odd jobs and dreams of grandeur.  The three of us look at each other and laugh, but deep down we know: We traded big bucks for a launching pad; space to make a difference and a name.  I know we’d do it over and over again.

Someday, it’ll be different.  We talk often about seeing the tides turn, and the ways in which we’re gearing up for our own successes. The stark white of my checkbook is intimidating- and in moments like tonight when the pile of bills seems to be taking over the hopeful attitude- I write to you, not to tell you that everything will be alright, (it will,) or that I care more about my job than my paycheck, (it’s true,) but:  Success is not what is or isn’t in my bank account.  I thank goodness everyday for clients and networking and the incredible people I’m able to help.  Those connections to me aren’t able to be priced.

The world tells us that to look successful? We have to act successful.  Success means more than financial means- and my greatest accomplishments never really involved money to begin with.  Small businesses run into this all the time- I call it, “The Great Lie.”  Even when business is booming, it’s still a struggle to figure out what client might help pay the rent next, or a very adorable preschooler’s daycare bill; the struggle shapes us and defines what’s closest to our heart.  Those that are starting out in business, or switching careers linger too long in the ‘what-ifs.’  I’m telling you: sometimes a ridiculous paycut is exactly what you need- you’ll be stronger and more intelligent because of the experience.  You won’t cry at the ‘lack’ of something, but wonder instead: at the amazement of what you’ve overcome.

The condo is quiet at night, and when the breeze hits the vertical blinds it’s almost as if the wind is dancing with the interior and two are enveloped in one.  It reminds me as I look to Ava’s park, (the one she falls asleep each night staring at,) how far I’ve come.  Last year, I was struggling to find my passion at the ShinyHappyPlace.  Bills weren’t my challenge: Passion, was.  I would live poor for the rest of my life if it meant I was able to see the difference I can make in each moment, as I already do.  Just tonight I watched a highly-motivated woman look at her resume and see what I saw: Who She Already Was.  On the drive home I was incredibly grateful and inspired to have shared a meal, chatted about the business and helped her realize all she had to offer.

World: Don’t be afraid to take a paycut.  You might meet the most influential people of your life, and find that stepping back gives you a moving escalator to the future like you’ve never imagined.  Trust your instinct and know that rebirth can happen the strangest circumstances; ones that you’ve never imagined.

The bills might sit on my kitchen table for a while.  Someday, the memory of crunching numbers and giggling might be a distant memory.  It’s too easy to focus on the have-nots, and that’s not the way I want to live.

The real measure of your wealth is how much you’d be worth if you lost all your money.  ~Author Unknown