Week One: Throw out the shit in my fridge. (Goodbye Cherry Coke, Goodbye cookies, goodbye sweet, sweet banana chips.) Fridge is loaded with the following for snacks:

Grapes, raw veggies, (Cucumber, broccoli.) Water.

One treat: (My crack: Grape Soda.)

I don’t focus on working out- I focus on establishing killer eating patterns.

Done!  

….

Week Two: Start Establishing better Eating Out Patterns. Salads with lemon as dressing – (which is actually decent, when paired with a light vinagrette.. or Ranch.) No Dessert. Small snacks instead of meals. (I utterly failed at this.) I call that method a fail in general. I was always freaking hungry, plus? I’m on the go so damn much that stuffing my mouth in drive-through was all I could manage. Alright.. alright.. I can do this.

Friday Night? Salad and 1/4 of a blt. Water, baby!  

I managed to go to a carnival/fair-food extravaganza and eat only a pickle on a stick- thankyouverymuch. (Then we went out to eat, and I manged to eat 1/4 french fries- and 1/2 a french dip sandwich, (minus the bun.) Cherry Coke was spectacular- thankyouverymuch.

Done!

….

Week Three: (This, awful, evil, week.)

Fitness Test. (Depressing.) I have to state before I took the fitness test? I ate a spoonful of frosting. I told myself it was alright and that I’d work it off. I think I worked off breakfast also.

How many push-ups in 60 seconds? (20) A very low number….

How many crunches in 60 seconds? (There was no way to determine whether I should do the full ons, or the girly ones.) I did a mixture. 63- suckas! (See, mom-tummy? You’s gonna be gone.)

How many pull-ups. (Wtf is a pull-up?)

What is my heartrate now? (Slightly escalated, perhaps out of the simple fact that I managed to do 63 crunches and tear open the sunburn on my back with my amazing carpet at the same time.) Pain is gain- (I keep telling myself this.)

Week Three? Get the damn jogging stroller, (thanks, Derek!) and start what I call: Two Weeks of Personal Hell.

Workouts every morning after Ava is dropped off. (30 minutes warm up, 30 minutes jogging, biking- elevating something else than my hand to my mouth.) I’m one point over normal weight in the BMI range. I expect to see a drop next to normal weight by the end of the two weeks. I may not be toned- but I’ll have developed a month of healthier eating and steady exercise- to prove to myself that an actual gym membership might be worth it. (GoGo Chaska Rec Center!)

 Do I sound high? I think it’s a mixture of tonight’s frosting and 63 sit ups. I call that -good.-