His name was Evan and he was just six weeks old. He never took his first steps or learned how to use his hands to hold a spoon. He never even sang a song- he never saw fireworks.
Evan’s grandma, (Tina Miller-Steiner,) took some depression medication then two cocktails and what happens next, is something she either can’t remember, or doesn’t want to. Miller-Steiner’s daughter found her, laying face down and poor Evan was already gone. They haven’t been able to tell the police or investigators the same story.
I’m being condemned,” she said of the possibility that she might be charged. “I made a mistake, and the Lakeville Police Department thinks I need to pay for it,” she said, but “I’m already suffering.” The search warrant request came early May 10 as police sought to check Miller-Steiner’s blood for alcohol. A breath test had registered her intoxicated, with a blood concentration of 0.12 at the scene, the search warrant papers say. The legal standard for intoxication is 0.08. Blood test results were unavailable from police this week, though police say they show she was impaired even some time after the tragedy. (-www.twincities.com)
I think any new parent has been fearful to sleep with their child- afraid to crush him or accidentally roll over. I’ve heard very, very little accounts of this happening without other effects, (drugs, alcohol.) But still, pediatricians warn not to sleep with them. Bassinets are inexpensive, and could have saved little Evan’s life.
What’s more-so? When will we learn, even the most daft of us that mixing alcohol and drugs is a recipe for absolute disaster? How many more innocent deaths by car, by our own hands do we need to realize before people like Miller-Steiner get help for the addictions they harbor? A ‘couple drinks’ and ‘some painkillers’ cost her grandson his life. That’s what happened here. But Tina just can’t imagine ‘being condemned’ on top of the pain she’s already suffering, (including a mother that died of cancer a year ago.) We no longer want to be held accountable for our mistakes if we are hurting. Being sad and ‘learning your lesson’ is not nearly enough when it comes to a human’s life. Thank God the, “I’m hurting!” excuse doesn’t hold up in our courts. Grandma doesn’t realize this: True self-responsibility happens when you let go of your own emotions about the situation and find your faults- tuning into the emotions of others. She’s not there yet and I won’t hold my breath.
“I haven’t been charged with anything, and I’m really appalled that I have people coming with cameras in our face when we’ve had this tragic accident,” she said. “To have people in my face, it’s no respect for me and no respect for our family. … It was a tragic accident.”
Goodbye, Evan.
(Above The Influence: help for alcohol and drugs)
Dear writer.
It is interesting that you feel compelled to comment on this news article with only the facts reported by the local news papers. Again as you stated, this grandmother has NOT been charged with anything.
I really do not consider taking anti-depressants and having cocktails a night of “drugs and drinking” for a 45 year old woman at her own home.
Yesterday, on the anniversary of her mothers death to cancer, she saw her name, address and questionable reports and opinions spread across the media about how she is a baby killer. You cannot tell me that she is not suffering.
These “rare” cases of child death that occur when a child sleeps with an adult is also called co-sleeping or bed sharing. Google it and you will find several reports and some studies that are looking at dangers of this practice.
I am not an advocate for drinking while caring for children or infants but I also think other factors can influence alertness like sleep deprivation and emotional state.
I do not claim to have all the answers or know what the future will hold for this grandmother and her family. I just wish you and them Peace in your heart.
Note: Miller-Steiner drank two martinis between 5 and 7 p.m., she said, and then placed Evan in her bedroom for a nap, according to the warrant. She then went to make dinner and lay down next to him at 7 p.m. to feed him.
A police sergeant at the scene gave Miller-Steiner a preliminary breath test, which indicated 0.12 blood-alcohol content, according to the warrant. A BAC of 0.08 is the legal limit for drunken driving.
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A blood test the next mid-morning still indicated she was severely intoxicated. They are investigating to whether it really was ‘just two drinks.’ (Two drinks wouldn’t keep a 45 year old woman intoxicated for that long. There had to be other factors or significantly more alcohol. I think we can all understand that.
Any grandmother that would put a few drinks and haphazard safety in front of her grandchild’s well-being, (in my opinion and since this is an OP piece,) is not one that is without responsibility for what happened.
I sincerely appreciate your opinion and your willingness to comment. As a mom, I can only imagine the complete horror her entire family is facing as they cope with this tragic loss.
I didn’t comment on the article, but the situation. When something hits my heart, I respond.
I wish you well!
girlmeetsgeek
Girl, you invited me to join this discussion, and maybe I’m too drowsy to think clearly….
Criminal negligence should be the charge, with a court order to rehab from alcohol. It’s standard procedure when a crime is a result of intoxication.
What’s jail going to do, but make this woman a burden on the tax payers.
This woman is hurting, and (should) feels genuine guilt for what’d happen. Hopefully these turn of events will help her kick her drinking habit and turn a new leaf.
She’ll seek forgiveness from her family, society, and God (assuming she’s a religious woman)… and hopefully this can be cleared of her concious.
The baby wasn’t beaten, wasn’t violently shaken. He was loved by his grandmother, but she wasn’t in the proper state to care for a child.
I don’t feel anger. Maybe pity and sadness for the situation.
The author of http://www.girlmeetsgeek.com has written an excellent article. You have made your point and there is not much to argue about. It is like the following universal truth that you can not argue with: A person who says something is impossible is usually interrupted by the person doing it. Thanks for the info.